While away on vacation overseas, and probably severely jet lagged, I decided to invite my potential stallion (PS) to a Lifestyle hotel takeover party occurring shortly after my return. Why do I keep doing things against my initial instincts with him? I'd told myself that I needed to pull back some, but we'd been on a very good run over the last several weeks- fun impromptu dates, amazing sex, he'd met some of my friends, I randomly met some of his family, he brought me a plant, and more amazing sex.
I think all of the endorphins and pheromones from so many orgasms skewed my judgment, but I really did want to experience one of these events with a true play partner. Poor judgment notwithstanding, I invited him, he accepted, and I hastily booked a hotel room. I didn't really want to be in the thick of the action, but I wanted to be at least relatively close. I stupidly overlooked booking at the overflow hotel (I mentioned that I was jet lagged, right?), and instead booked one down the street. Done deal.
I returned from vacation, we had a spectacular welcome-back sex session, and then the party weekend was upon us. PS apparently went to the party on Thursday night for a bit (I wasn't sure who accompanied him, because single males weren't allowed, but I didn't ask any questions), so a girlfriend and I decided to attend on Friday night to scope out the scene. Single females are always welcome at these things.
It was just as I remembered from events past- a swinger's rave- loud club music, skimpy costumes (even in 55 degree temps), sexual tension, and mostly beautiful people from all over the country wanting to partake in any degree of lifestyle activity, from just partying, to flirting, to some degree of swapping.
Oddly, I have found that when I attend social outings, I often am much more fun, confident, and outgoing when I roam alone, not with a friend or a partner. I think this is because my ex husband was such a social butterfly that he would often leave me alone, so I was forced to learn how to socialize by myself. A wingman is usually more of a hinderance for me, because I look to them to take the lead while i sink into observation mode and become very shy.
At the party, once my girlfriend and I separated, I talked, flirted, and danced with couples, making note of new friends to whom I could introduce to PS and compiling my “top three” list of couples with whom I'd like to play. I let a few hands rub me, exchanged a couple of kisses, but let that be the limit. I had no particular desire to partake of anything by myself that evening, although the offers were hanging out there, some outright, some implied.
The next day, PS and I made a tentative game plan- we both wanted to experience some degree of a swap, whether full or soft, so we were somewhat working toward that goal. We had sex before leaving, although honestly I would have liked to have waited and built the anticipation and tension a bit.
Walking into the pool party, we tried to get our bearings. It wasn't too crowded, we'd arrived early, so I stripped down to my sexy bikini and we took a quick lap around the pool. I saw some of my new friends; their group had a party suite which PS and I used as a sort of “home base” throughout the day to periodically relax, hear some different music (EDM all day can be a bit draining) and make drinks.
The pool party itself was good fun and quickly filled up to overflowing. We drank, met people, people watched, and strolled around. LS events are always an ego boost for me- I loved receiving compliments and flirtation from women and men alike, and PS seemed proud to be with me. I saw some of my new acquaintances as well as old friends and introduced him. I must admit, he took to everything quite well, which didn't surprise me- he's a natural charmer and was able to be simultaneously outgoing and cool enough to not seem overly eager. There were only a few instances where I gave him a bit of the side-eye, but we had a great time throughout the day. Although my top couple did not seem like they were inclined to play at all (and they seemed a tad more standoffish than they had the previous night when I was alone, so I wasn't sure how to read that), and my second choice couple was nowhere to be found, my third choice seemed ready and willing… but they were in the overflow hotel and our hotel was too far away. They also seemed tied to a couple that didn't spark my interest. Well, the woman did, but the man, not so much (a common occurrence for me) Drat! I wasn't sure how to handle this- make a date for later? Suggest we go to their room? But what if they didn't want to leave the party? I was at a loss.
As someone who is naturally shy, and spending time as a unicorn when you never have to ask or initiate, I was used to others making the first move or the suggestion that we move into the action phase. PS, being new, didn't want to be the one to “close the deal”- he didn't want to be seen as creepy or overly aggressive. So, the moment passed.
The party began to wind down, and we headed to leave. On the way out, we encountered a sexy couple in their room and flirted with them a bit. It wasn't until we'd left that I realized that we missed another opportunity. Oops. But there was no outright invitation? We needed to figure this out.
After showering, eating, and getting ready, we headed back for the night party. Although I was not feeling quite as awesome as I had during the day, we both still had a fantastic time, dancing, drinking, taking pictures with some of my friends. There were again some kisses exchanged and some heavy flirting. But throughout the night, I felt like we were on a futile hunt for an experience that never materialized. We modified our goal to me just finding a woman and playing while he watched. No dice there either. People had already made friends, connections and play partners from previous nights, others had already partied themselves out and were feeling ill or tired, we were propositioned by those we didn't necessarily find appealing, we couldn't find those we wanted, signals got crossed, logistics weren't good (why did I book a hotel down the street again?!). It just wasn't in the cards for us.
Regardless, we made our own fun- sex on the balcony, sex at the “home base” suite, sex in some random empty room (i learned later that it was one of the “playrooms”) and finally sex in our own hotel room at 5am. I was very happy, only mildly disappointed, and I think PS felt pretty much the same way.
So it should be all good, right?
To be continued.
