Author: Duncan

‘As I experience certain sensory input patterns, my mental pathways become accustomed to them. The inputs eventually are anticipated and even missed when absent.’ Lieutenant Commander Data on Friendship Aren’t all friendships really about shared experiences? It’s really the shared times, efforts, sacrifices and life stories that build close relationships. The more of these you share, the closer you are with someone, as long as the sharing is mutually rewarding. So this entry does not have a lot to do with swinging or kink or anything to do with the subject of the Swingset. It does, however, have everything to…

Like so many others at this time of year, we hosted a holiday open house for friends and family. Like so many others in the lifestyle, however, we also have spent most of our party time at clubs or swinger parties over the past couple of years. I also suspect that like others in the lifestyle, Mrs. Duncan and I have also talked about presumably vanilla friends that we think could be in the lifestyle. A corollary of vanilla friends we wouldn’t mind having in the lifestyle as we think it would be fun to play with them. These discussions…

We consider our serious entry into the lifestyle beginning with joining and frequenting a local swingers club. We had been to a couple of house parties before and certainly spent some time researching and discussing, but the first actions that began our ongoing journey started with signing up and attending the club we now consider our home base. As discussed in a prior blog, attending and playing are two different things and it took us a while to get into the swing of things (for all of you screaming ‘ouch’, sorry about that- couldn’t resist), but we started down the…

While we call it ‘The Lifestyle,’ my guess is that for most, like for me, swinging is really more of a hobby. A hobby to which I devote what time I can, but a hobby nonetheless. Like people who are into camping or cooking or sailing or whatever, if there is time on the weekend available to pursue the hobby, I will. Any available Friday and/or Saturday night, you can find Mrs. Duncan and I at a club or a party or occasionally out with another couple. During the week, when time allows, we have even been known to attend…

‘Hi, my name is Duncan, and I am an Introvert’ ‘Hi, Duncan’ For my Myers-Briggsian friends, I am an INTJ to be exact, and a pretty heavily skewed one at that. I have been in recovery since college. I am only half joking when I speak of ‘recovery.’ I recognized that my introversion and social queue tone deafness was hurting me and decided to do something about it. I was never going to ‘cure’ my natural tendencies, but I could at least learn to mitigate the harmful behaviors. So what did this introversion look like in a social setting? I…

I was catching up on podcasts during my commute yesterday and Ginger said something that really struck me. It was in Swingset 124 and Ginger, Cooper and Dylan were talking about a listener email lamenting swinger doldrums. Ginger pointed out that we sometimes get jaded while we do things others only dream about. She, in an understated tone, said she has found herself saying something like ‘Oh yeah, that threesome at Desire last night was nice.’ You could almost hear the next sentence… ‘Please pass the margarine, Prof.’ I was immediately taken back to the playroom Mrs. Duncan and I…

It turns out that we are a bit of a rare breed, Mrs. Duncan and I. We enjoy both the swing and kink play. Most of the folks we know in the swing scene seem to think of the kink folks as an ‘interesting’ group who are doing some funky things over there, but don’t quite get them. Where is the sexy playtime? The kink folks are aware of the swing folks, but sex is not a part of most of their scenes. Since we do belong to both groups, I thought it would be fun to do a little…

“The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena… who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms… who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.” “It is hard to fail, but it is worse never to have tried to succeed.” ― Theodore Roosevelt I must not fear… Fear is the little-death… I will face my…

How on earth did we get here? I am awake and energized, awash with endorphins and a wonderful content grin- as one occasionally gets after great sex. Mrs. Duncan is cuddled up next to me sleeping, awash with endorphins and a wonderful content grin- as one frequently gets after great sex. We just had great sex. It was that awesome, reconnecting, intimate, fantastic love making we enjoy after a fun night of sexy playing at our favorite club (or house party or play date). Yup, we are swingers. We are also a bit kinky enjoying DS and pain play. But…