Author: Kat Stark

Late December for the past 3 years has been a time of thinking, “Thank the gods this year is over! May next year be a whole lot better!” The next years haven’t been better. If anything, they’ve been getting progressively worse and 2018 was no exception. I wrote a draft post last week that was essentially a laundry list of all the tough stuff that happened to me this year. It was a long list. A long and detailed list. I feel very hard done by with all the shit I’ve had to endure in 2018, but the more I…

Vibrators are wonderful partners in many people’s sex lives but it’s hard to know which ones are going to work for you. They’re usually described as either rumbly or buzzy but what the hell do those terms mean? Is one of them better than the other? Most toy reviewers would answer passionately that one is for sure the superior sensation but it’s because we’re all very biased based on what works for us as individuals. When we say one is better we mean that it’s better for us. The frequency of vibrations in a toy is what determines whether it’s…

Mixed emotions are a particularly human experience yet they always throw me for a loop. Being able to hold multiple feelings simultaneously allows us to compartmentalize enough to get through our days hating our jobs yet enjoying time with our coworkers. It also comes up a lot of the time when we’re angry at our loved ones yet still love them very much and care about their well being. Since becoming non-monogamous, I’ve dealt even more with the complexities of feeling multiple emotions at the same time. It has come up most often with feeling happy compersion feelings at the…

I love stripes! I am always going to be drawn in by striped objects be they underpants, stockings, drapes, or, in this case, dildos. The gorgeous coloured stripes of the Avant line of dildos by Blush Novelties appealed immediately and I was very happy to get my hands on both the Purple Rain Avant D2 and the Sexy In Pink Avant D4 courtesy of the kind folx at Blush. I’ll start with what the two share in common. The silicone in these toys is silky smooth and lovely to touch. I’m a highly tactile person and I’m really happy when…

Impermanence is something we all have to learn to deal with. Everything in our lives is always in flux and relationships are no exception, no matter how much we want them to be. When things change, we can feel like our really big, full lives become very small. When we’re in the early stages of a relationship, the New Relationship Energy (NRE) can be all encompassing. The new person is in our thoughts most of the time and we’re focused on all the wonderful things about them. Each new discovery of all the things we have in common and how…

The Lust Arts Unicorn Horn and Lust Burster are some of the most artistic and beautiful toys I’ve ever had the pleasure to experience. A lot of thought was clearly put into design and materials and hey really are works of art. I have been displaying the incredible Lust Burster Xenomorph dildo on my mantle when I haven’t been using it to do wonderful things to myself and others. The silicone in both toys is delightfully flexible and squishy and feels really great to the touch. The subtle iridescence and depth of the colours draw the eye to want to…

It’s been a long time since I’ve written a blog post that wasn’t a review. I’ve felt like a bit of a sex blogger fraud and like I haven’t had anything to say since it’s been a long time since I’ve been up to anything slutty. Hell, I’d subtitled my book The Wet Coast Confessions of an Anxious Slut and I began to fear people might call me out on not living up to it. My battles with mental illness, particularly depression, essentially stole the latter half of last year and the first few months of this one. Getting sexy…

Le Wand is a beautiful toy. There’s no denying the elegance of the shape and styling of this wand massager. I received the Space Grey colour and really loved the aesthetics of the metallic silver and grey. It also comes in Pearl White which is pretty with the rose gold accents but I think the grey is a much nicer option. The head of the wand is a velvety silicone that feels wonderful under the fingers, although does collect and show dust and cat hair to an impressive degree. It’s rechargeable and with a full charge of 3 hours will…

There’s no wrong way to receive a sexy photo, right? Unfortunately, that is incorrect. There’s much talk about what rules you need to follow when sending sexy pics–Consent! Consent! Consent!–but there are also important aspects to keep in mind when someone sends you some sexy snaps. Before I say anything else, I will mention the thing that shouldn’t need to be said: keep all sexy photos someone sends you completely private unless they give you explicit permission to share them. Yes. Even if you break up and you’re mad at them. Revenge porn is never okay. Moving on. Sending someone…

It’s not often I’d describe a toy as a game changer, but the Pro G-Spot Rabbit completely rewrote the rules for my orgasms. I’m the first to admit that I’m not someone who gets a lot from external clit stimulation and generally prefer the jackhammer approach of the big rumbly wands to get off. While I’ve really enjoyed pleasant sensations from the previous Satisfyer toys I’ve tried, they could never progress me to an orgasm. I couldn’t have been more shocked when within 15 minutes of using the Pro G-Spot Rabbit, I was orgasming the way I’ve never done without…