Scheduling… Period


I hate trying to schedule dates. Not because they aren’t fun, but because it usually needs to be done a good ways in advance. There are a few reasons, like not knowing if you will be in the mood for it that day. Specifically though I want to talk about periods because I have become required to track Anne’s period. I know better when it is going to occur than she does. That shit is tracked in my google calendar via this handy tool.

Now, I wouldn’t mind knowing when it is going to occur, but that isn’t what I know. Anne isn’t on hormonal birth control. She has a non-hormonal copper IUD because hormonal birth control has never been good to her for one reason or another. With all the varying kinds of hormonal birth control Anne has tried she always had one or more issues: low libido, spotting, weight gain, etc. For a long time we just used condoms. The IUD was a god send in regards to those symptoms, but it didn’t come without its own issues. For example, now her period is heavy, lasts longer, and is more unpredictable, that is not to say that it was ever light, short, or predictable, but it is worse now.

So where does that leave me in regards to trying to schedule dates and things. It leaves me looking at my google calendar, casting runes, reading tea leaves, charting stars, and trying to divine the arcane secrets out of nothing. My calendar usually has a good 5 to 7 day span marked “Communists?” that only denotes when Anne’s period could start. You never know when the reds could strike. Keeping in mind after it starts it lasts a good 5 to 7 days. Doing math there that puts a good two weeks out of every month in danger of being screwed up by her period.

I obviously don’t blame Anne for this, but good god does it give me a headache when trying to schedule anything. I generally just let people know that they that the date could be messed up and why. They don’t seem to mind. Now, period dates do occur. After all there are still plenty of activities that are fun for everyone that could happen. But every time we decide to let them know about the period and go out anyways, Anne ends up having a migraine or really bad cramps. That leads to us leaving early or canceling all together. I always feel bad, but people always understand. Well if they didn’t understand then they probably wouldn’t be worth seeing again anyways.

Why am I in charge of scheduling when Anne is the one that has more scheduling concerns? Well, mainly because I am more organized and have more free time, especially during the day, when I end up chatting with people and setting these things up. This post might have been a little ranty, but scheduling just frustrates me sometimes.


An average suburbanite barely into his 30s, Jack has recently begun a more exciting secret sexy life with his wife, Anne. These experiences have led him to preach the gospel of sex positivity and safer sex to anyone who will listen.


  1. Boy do I know how you feel. For these exact reasons we have stopped dating in the conventional way and now only meet people at our local club. Tis way of either side drops out, it does not mean a wasted evening.

    Mr no Name

  2. Earthangel496 on

    Boy do I feel your pain.  I call it mystery math.  It is a mystery if it is going to be 21, 28, or 35 days or some other mystery number, but if you have plans that is when it will show up.

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