Do You Know What That Dildo Is Made Of?

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My name is Zoe Hanis and I learned very early that it matters what you put in your body in order to masturbate.

When I was a teenager, I had no idea why girls wanted to have sex (due to poor experiences). When my best friend told me that she masturbated, I thought she was nuts. But she seemed convincing; if I tried it, sex would be better. So I figured that I would give it a try.

Having no idea how to go about masturbating, I scoured the house for something phallic shaped. It was my thought that if I could use something like a dildo to reproduce the sexual act, I might find pleasure.

While the idea had merit, the implementation of it was more difficult. I couldn’t come up with much that looked even vaguely cock-shaped. I even looked in my parents’ nightstand, but found only condoms. Then inspiration struck me one morning while I was teasing my hair. (This was the mid 80’s and big hair was the in thing) I had curling irons in just about every diameter imaginable.

I cringe looking back at my teenage self and wish that I could have thought to ask someone or at the very least look up the information; though the internet was not available. I figured that using a curling iron barrel would be fine so long as it was unplugged and not heated. It was not fine; not in the least. I didn’t think about the fact that the hair products had corroded the metal. So I ended up with not only mousse and hair gel inside my pussy, but tiny rust particles as well.

As one can imagine, this did nothing to help my impression of sex; especially when I ended up with both a urinary tract infection and a yeast infection. I am grateful that those were the only ramifications. I only tried the one time, but I can imagine that repeated use could have been much more damaging. I was lucky.

The thing is, many toys sold today could be as dangerous as my rusting curling iron. There is little government regulation when it comes to the materials used in sex toys. So it is up to the manufactures to uphold certain standards; especially in regards to safety. Unfortunately, some manufactures may claim a product to be body safe even when it is not.

Enter Dildology.org.

Dildogoy.org is a not-for-profit organization that contracts to have scientific laboratory tests done on sex toys to make sure that the materials used in manufacturing are what they are advertised to be. These same kinds of tests are run on nearly everything that touches our bodies, why should we expect anything less for things that touch us in such intimate ways. This will allow us as consumers to hold the manufactures to higher standards without extra government regulation. So that consumers can make educated choices about what to use in/on their bodies.

But Dildology.org can’t operate without your help. Their only method for collecting funds is by donation. So when Dangerous Lilly put out a call for sex toy bloggers/reviewers to help with a fundraiser for Dildology.org, I knew that I couldn’t let the opportunity for Life on the Swingset to help pass by.

When Life on the Swingset first began, the staff reviewed whatever they could. As the podcast grew and the website had more traffic, they were able to demand better quality toys. Since Cooper asked me to run the product reviews department, we set the bar even higher for what we would review for you, our listeners/readers. It is extremely important to us that what we recommend is of high quality and the most basic of those qualities is that the material be what it claims to be: body safe.

Dildology.org can help towards that goal. So I am asking that you please join me in supporting this worthy cause.

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Dildology.org has numerous incentives starting with as low a donation as $15.

The majority of the monetary donations that Dildology.org collects goes towards the funding of product testing; the remainder will be spent on fundraising merchandise/incentives, and equipment for experiments and the development of educational resources.

You can find Dildology.org on Facebook or follow along on twitter @Dildology

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Zoe first described herself as "bad at monogamy" until about five years ago when she and her husband discovered the term that actually described her: polyamorous. Since then they have opened their family to other partners. Zoe is currently juggling relationships with her husband, their two kids, her husband's girlfriend, and a slew of friends/loves that she calls her tribal poly family. She can be reached on facebook or on twitter @ZoeHanis

2 Comments

  1. Great post. It’s so important! I don’t buy sex toys very often any more, but whenever I do, I realise how hard it can be to really find out what toys are made of. Dildology is such an excellent idea, and although I can’t contribute (yet), I will be watching closely.

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