Oversexed and aggressive: A couple of qualities you are likely to hear if you asked a vanilla person about what swingers are like. While I’ll heartily admit to being the former (although I can’t speak for everyone), I have encountered very few hotties who have come across as the latter. In fact, what I have discovered is quite the opposite.
Many sexies I have been fortunate to meet and date have been highly skilled in the art of the tease: the long, delicious, playful seduction dance. Swingers are superior flirters, because we get a lot of practice. We get to try out new fun flirting techniques. We get to sharpen our seduction skills until they are the razor’s edge.
Unfortunately in the vanilla world, flirting is often frowned upon and meant to be saved for only the dating scene. And, of course, if you are in a monogamous long-term relationship, most of those folks put their teasing tactics in the drawer next to their sexy panties, only to be pulled out for anniversaries. (Indeed, there are monogamers out there who are enlightened enough to know that even if it is only okay to flirt with one another they continue to keep their relationship hot by doing so every chance they get. Cheers to them!)
One of the beauties of being in an open relationship is getting to get your flirt on all the time with no confliction or guilt. Indeed, Prof loves to hear about the hotties I have been fortunate enough to flirt with throughout my work day and I love to hear his stories of the same. It’s so erotic and hot to visualize all the sexy women he has titillated with his sincere and clever compliments. He is truly an über skilled, teasing flirter. Indeed, he reeled me in with his irresistible hard-to-get tactics and silver tongue. (Oh, and yes, the silver tongue is irresistible in other ways too.)
So when it comes to swingers, I have always experienced advanced and subtly sexy seduction a far cry from, “Hey, baby, come here often?” And, despite the fact that we are a sexually-open, sex-positive lot, or maybe because of that, we are often connoisseurs seeking the nuanced and luxuriant erotic experience, including the luscious seduction and a confident, exquisite tease.
Owning your sexuality and having confidence that there are always enough hot experiences to go around foster creative seduction and anticipation-building teasing. Swingers tend to live in that world and have mastered the art of the tease and the refined flirt game. I say, “Game on.”
