Unfortunately, the actual functionality of the toy is less impressive than its appearance. The first time I tried to use it, it was poorly charged. I'd pulled it out on a whim, and discovered that it was clearly not up to the task I was asking of it. “No problem,” thought I, “I'll just plug it into the wall and be good to go!” To my disappointment, I learned that the Allegro won't function while it is plugged in. Jack thinks this is some kind of safety feature; that may be true, but it's also an annoyance, especially for a toy that has no other kind of backup system–if it isn't charged, you simply can't use it at all until it is. No changing batteries or anything like that. It also has no indicator that tells you when it is charged (or needs to be charged); I had no idea how long it needed to be plugged in, so I just let it go for about 8 hours. I have just now, literally as I sit here writing this review, found a page in the booklet (which, for the record, is 160 pages long) with information about charging the toy and a chart of the different vibration cycles it includes. According to these instructions, the charging time is about 6 hours, and a toy at full charge should have 2-3 hours worth of use.
The power button is way too hard to push–it literally hurts my finger to turn this thing on or off. And when holding the toy the way it is clearly designed to be held, I can't get enough force behind my index finger to turn it on at all; I have to hold the Allegro in one hand and push the button with the other hand. The second button, the one that cycles through the different types of vibration, works just fine, and I can't understand why the power button is so much more difficult to push.
As mentioned, the Allegro is clearly designed to be held in a certain way, and it fits nicely into my hand (though it is fitted for the right hand, so lefties get no love here). However, when I tried to use it, I found that to actually hold it in that way and position it properly against my clitoris was damn near impossible (and awkward to the point of discomfort for my wrist). I wound up just kind of mashing it against my groin and holding it down, which was nothing like the elegant and sophisticated experience I'd been led to expect.
The bottom of the toy features a “massage ball,” which is presumably intended to be the point of contact for clitoral stimulation. While the rest of the toy is covered in a silky, sensual-feeling material, the ball on the bottom is just regular hard plastic. Why is the ball of the toy the part that is the least pleasurable to touch? It's also, in my opinion, too big–I can't focus the vibrations tightly enough on my clitoris because there is too much surface area on the ball.
The vibration modes also cycle in what seems to me to be an odd order. The Allegro begins with constant, low-level vibration. It then cycles through a couple of increasingly intense constant vibrations, and only then does it move into the pulsating modes. It seems strange to me that the pulsating modes come at the end of the cycle, rather than at the beginning; personally, those are the ones I use as foreplay–they get me warmed up, but it's the constant vibration that gets me off in the end. The Allegro seems to have things all backwards.
Ultimately, I did manage to get off with the Allegro, but it was one of the least satisfying orgasms I've ever had with a vibrating toy. (In fairness, I should note that I tend to like really intense stimulation, and the Allegro is a bit more subtle than what I usually go for.) Its design hinders rather than helps the process, and I felt like I had to work around the toy's flaws rather than work with it. It looks great, and even now I can't help but pick it up and hold it, but I don't think it'll see much use in my bedroom.
Full Disclosure: We did not purchase this product, it was sent to us specifically for review. Our policy is to, regardless of how we acquired a product, review it fairly and openly. No writer for Life On The Swingset will ever deliberately mislead our readers into believing that a product is good because of anything we received from the company. We are open and honest, and cannot be bought or bribed. If we love a product, we'll tell you, if we don't, BELIEVE us, we'll tell you that too. End disclaimer.
